tcnetwork | Cool Ranch Harry / Lyoshka Aethra

You keep saying that, but I know a hell of a lot more than you give me credit for.

Prove it. Name something about me that isn't about him or 'you thought you were dead.'

[So a theory she's been working on comes spilling out.]

You're so damned determined to be some other person, you'd rather give up the chance to see your wife and children again.

But I don't think it really has anything to do with insisting you're different, and everything to do with something so the same with him, that you think you're so damaged, it's not worth it.

I will not be cast in as a part of your dark fate. There's some other version of me doing exactly that right now.

[ Snapping his glare from Greene to her. ]

I'm already past my 'dark fate'. There's no countdown, there are no days hours minutes and seconds til the day something fucking awful happens to me. My head isn't filled with the knowledge that I can't stop it, because it happened, and there's nothing.

[Glare right back. She's used to the guilt-ridden. SHIELD is built on them.]

And here I am, playing the part you cast me in.

[That snap? Proved her point.]

What happened to you is over. You have a whole life ahead of you, and that rate you're getting inexplicably younger, that's a hell of a long life ahead of you.

You can't erase what happened, but you can make that dark fate a moment, rather than look at everything after this as nothing.

I've already been cast aside as nothing by one person, and you can go to hell, if you think I'm letting you do that to me too.

[ Has he even noticed the age thing? Maybe. Hard to say. For now, he ignores it. ]

I haven't done anything to you. [ Beyond blow a digeridoo in her face. ] The only reason it's over is because of you. Even if I find a way to go to some previous version of my family or my life, it's not the same. They're not the same. Those people have already moved on.

[She puts Greene down, and he scampers out, because he's not into the whole humans arguing thing.]

You've done nothing but tell me every single idea I've had to try and restore you to some part of your life, is a pointless. As if I don't understand what it's like to have everyone and everything I know be one giant question.

It's like you're trying to talk me into thinking I was wrong. That I should've left you where you were.

You're not behaving like it's over.

Not every idea. I opened that restaurant, didn't I?

[ He sure did. Or, well. He is. ]

That's what you hold up? Instead of going back to those you love most in the world, that's okay, you're opening a restaurant.

[She's going to poke him for that, a stern you-can't-distract-me-from-my-point poke.]

The idea was giving yourself a vocation while we work on getting you back to your life. To start integrate you back into a world where you can think of the future.

Yeah, well, clearly I'm integrating great. [ Well, he did have a series of one night stands with a princess. But still. ] Why do you think I'd be fine now? I haven't even gone to my own world to see my father or my sister.

You certainly seemed to be with our esteemed guest. Maybe I'll get Harry to make you up a loveboard of your own, and then you can find someone else to integrate yourself with.

[She went there.]

And I'm not saying you are fine. I'm saying look ahead, find a new definition of fine, or that maybe you can go back to your Nica.

Stop telling me every idea I have about sending you home is wrong. I'm not an idiot. I'm not unknowledgeable about these things. I'm tired of feeling like I somehow did you wrong by making it possible for you to be here.

Yeah, I got the message from your rabbit that that wasn't 'okay'. [ So he's not going to discuss it even a little bit more than that. At all. At least not with her. ]

I didn't say you were an idiot.

Greene doesn't know any better, and he loves me. And if you ever bring that camera back, delete whatever pictures you take.. I'm starting to think Greene's picture is influencing Harry's math.

[Point, where did it go, oh yes here.]

And she's gone. I bet if I asked Harry to do one for you, you could go out and integrate with a dozen people.

You know that when you say "no," or "you don't understand," to every single thing, that sums up to "you're an idiot," or you're one of those annoying mansplainers, but I'm going to assume both you and Harry share not having that trait.

[ Pausing. ]

I'm not who I was when I die...when I left. At all. Not one bit.

So? No one said you had to be.

[She's still sounding snappish, because being that angry doesn't go away in a heartbeat.]

Do you not think Nica would be so grateful to have you back she wouldn't care? You should've seen her after Harry was in the otherworld for a short time. She was deliriously happy.

Unless you're telling me you didn't have a happy marriage, and your kids somehow arrived only through science.

Ask this Nica why it's unlikely she's even there anymore.

Because someone like me definitely isn't there?

Ever consider that someone might want to keep Nica alive? Find a way to help her heart? Hell, I'll bet Seth worked on that for his science fair in secondary school.

Edited 2017-05-17 04:55 (UTC)

Maybe. Maybe. But a lot of things are maybe. Like, maybe she moved on. Maybe they didn't stay in New Dodge.

Edited ( ) 2017-05-17 05:08 (UTC)

But finding them wouldn't be that hard, once you're in the right timeline.

Wouldn't you love to see your dad again?

UCB-2185. I may not know where my wife and my children are, but I know my own U-Code. I would love to see my dad. Of course I would. I just...how do I explain what happened to me?

Tell them the truth. Explain what happened. Give them a chance to accept it.

And if they don't?

Then you married and fathered horrible people.

Do you really think they're going to reject you because a terrible thing happened to you? Do you really think your wife and children are horrible people.

I'm not really worried about people I can't get to at the moment.

Then who else would matter enough to worry about?

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